Stop Working for Peanuts

I see too many struggling to make ends meet. Why can't the silly Earthlings make $100 an hour? I almost understand working for low wages if the work is fascinating. But even fascinating can be turned into $100 an hour with plenty of effort. At our next meeting on Zort let's work on helping the silly Earthlings make at least $100 an hour.

How to Help the Silly Earthlings Become Wealthy

I notice Earthlings expect to become wealthy someday. Yet they work at jobs that pay peanuts and spend their free time playing games, watching movies and other nonsense that makes no money. I call them on this contradiction, explaining they need to spend most of their time making money or investing and they give me flimsy excuses to not make money.

Is this a brain malfunction? A defective gene? May we haul all the silly Earthlings to planet Zort and run them through our defrigulator? Let's discuss this at our next meeting.